Last autumn, I casually opened a notepad and did some calculations. The revenue for that month and the time I spent on it. It was just a simple division of two numbers, but my hand hesitated slightly. Looking at the answer that came out, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry for a while. Since starting personal development, I've consciously avoided talking about money. But I saw a post in an online community about someone who said "I calculated my hourly wage"—and drawn in by their honest confession, I decided to try it myself. That calculation unexpectedly showed me clearly "why I continue." Today I'm writing about that.
What prompted me to "try it"
The trigger was an article posted by K-san, someone in the same personal development community. K-san wrote that when they created a tool over 3 months and their monthly revenue reached 2,800 yen, they realized their total work hours had been 180 hours. When calculated, the hourly wage came to about 16 yen. I couldn't help but laugh at the line "It was less than 1/100th of a convenience store part-time job wage."
The night I read that post, I decided to calculate mine too. Six months since release. Total revenue was about 38,000 yen. The time spent writing code, adjusting designs, replying to support emails, rewriting the landing page over and over... I gathered logs from my planner and added them up to get roughly 620 hours.
The result of the division was 61 yen per hour.
The moment I saw the number
I stared at the number on the screen for a while. It was a strange feeling—I couldn't even get angry. Even though it was "too low to laugh at," I kept staring at it, and I think that's because the number didn't lie.
Converted to part-time work, that's 0.6 hours. Not even enough for one lunch. When I thought that, I suddenly heard another voice in my head: "Then why did you do 620 hours?"
Evidence of being driven by something other than money
Trying to answer that question, I realized I had always been driven by something "other than" money.
When the first user registered, just getting the notification made me do a fist pump alone in my room. When I got feedback right after release saying "I'd be happy if there was this feature," I was grinning at 2 AM while replying.
I thought, that's not the kind of joy a person earning 61 yen per hour would feel. But it was true.
The low hourly wage revealing "distorted decision-making"
However, the calculation had another side to it. Of the 620 hours, what percentage was actually necessary work?
Looking back, there were at least 4 features I started on without anyone asking me to. Things I began just because "it might be fun," that ended up unused. By simple calculation, 60-80 hours disappeared there.
In the comments on K-san's post, someone else wrote "When you calculate it, the weight of wasted work becomes clear," and that hit home too. I realized that calculating hourly wage is also an act of taking inventory of how you spend your time.
What M-san said: "Use numbers rather than remember them"
I told M-san, someone I'd met in the same community, about this the week after I did the calculation. M-san had started personal development much earlier than me and had released multiple tools.
"Lily, did you write down that hourly wage number?" they asked. "I kept staring at it, but I didn't really write it down," I answered. Then they said, "That's wasteful. Numbers aren't for remembering—they're for using in your next decision."
Something switched in me with those words.
What it means to use it in decisions
What M-san taught me was the habit of, once a month before deciding "how many hours will this feature take to implement," referring back to my past hourly wage. For example, if I'm in a 60-yen-per-hour phase and about to spend 40 hours on a feature no one asked for, pause that decision. Ask myself again if it really needs to be done now.
It's just that, but it was a big change for me. After that, when I had a new feature idea, I could pause and think "maybe this doesn't need to be now." Of the four spontaneous ideas, I'd only start on the one that resonated most. It's small, but it's a definite change.
How the low number paradoxically clarified things for me
About a month after the calculation, I noticed my mood had become lighter somehow.
The number 61 yen per hour hadn't changed. But it had started to look like "my current state" rather than "a bad situation." Even at 1/100th of a convenience store wage, the reason I'd spent 620 hours here wasn't money. That became paradoxically clear by doing the calculation.
There's a huge difference between vaguely "continuing for some reason" and "continuing while understanding why I continue even at 61 yen per hour." Becoming the latter actually made me able to judge "when to quit" more calmly.
Maybe I was looking for a reason to quit
To be honest, I was a bit tired before doing the calculation. More than anxiety about revenue not growing, there was always this question in the back of my mind: "Does this work have meaning?"
Maybe calculating the hourly wage was me "looking for a reason to quit" somewhere. But the answer that came out was the opposite. If I've been driven for 620 hours by something this low-paying, then it's not money driving me anymore.
I started keeping a monthly "hourly wage memo"
I copied M-san's advice directly and created a notebook to record revenue and time once a month. At first, just one line in a spreadsheet. Date, revenue, work hours, calculated hourly wage. That's all.
The first month was 61 yen. The next month was 74 yen. The month after that was 58 yen—a month where I spent too much time on feature additions. After three months, I could see the trend that "adding big features lowers the hourly wage." That might be obvious, but when you see it in numbers, your behavior changes.
I started writing with the premise of "showing it to someone"
Another thing I changed was how I write development notes. Instead of "for me to see later," I started being conscious of "can I answer if someone asks me how I spent my time?"
This is also subtle, but it works. "Just trying things out" decreased, and "what is this time for?" gradually became something I could articulate.
While writing about hourly wages, there's something I've been thinking about the whole time.
I don't think personal development, whether starting or continuing it, can really be measured by "hourly wage." I'm not saying money isn't a motivation. If your livelihood depends on it, revenue is urgent. But I don't think I would have continued for 620 hours if that were all.
The reason I can't quit is probably a simple but persistent desire to "see something I created solve someone's problem." I think that would remain the same whether the hourly wage is 61 yen or 1,000 yen.
I won't forget anytime soon the night I did the calculation, smiled wryly at the low number, and yet saw clearly why I continue.
If you're afraid to calculate the numbers, try it once. You might have a scary experience, but at the same time, you might also see a little more clearly why you're here.
Lily
Lily（@bokuwalily）― Personal developer. Making iOS apps and web services in tandem with AI
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Lily（@bokuwalily）― After leading a marketing organization of 50 people as CMO, I now make iOS apps and web services individually. I consult on customer acquisition, funnel design, and AI implementation and business automation
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